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chipotlazy:

never underestimate the power of a low quality webcam to make you look good in a selfie

fangpants:

Why do dudes always wanna know your bra size tho, what are they gonna do, buy you bras?? Cause that would be very helpful bras cost a lot of money i would save a fortune

ballpm:

i solve my problems by blatantly ignoring them and going on the internet

silenthill:

*puts my bro’s dick in my hand*

see, its a metaphor. it’s only gay if i jack it

spookyjacob:

ur not allowed to be busy youre my only friend

dulect:

when that one person you hate in your class speaks

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acomas:

my hobbies include eating and complaining that i’m getting fat